remix 041 ~ cold

inspired by “ladymorgaine81” :: original post
remixed image by “xjaymanx” :: added after composition


i feel cold

not bad
not angry
not sad
not depressed
not low
not any of that



i still hold true to my ideas of Silent Apathy
i’m not someone they particularly care about anyway
i’ve always known that’s how it always was
i didn’t get it then, it’s still the wrong term

but i understand now

perhaps Silent Apathy
isn’t really holding to how i am
it implies a deliberate ignorance on my part
at any rate, i can’t deliberately ignore

but i can stay away

she doesn’t need to hear from me
she doesn’t want to

but i will send it out

one last message before
she becomes a background figure

you don’t like it
i don’t care
i can’t help it
i am who i am
i’m a watcher
i keep track
i pay attention
and i guard

no amount of ranting will change that

remix 040 ~ 14 days

images by “mokk” :: original post
remixed image by “xjaymanx

14 days

14 days

going away
for two weeks

insults me
expects me
to apologise
for his mistakes

hurts me
a whore
for him

but i
love him
adore him

and he’s
going away
for two weeks

i don’t
i don’t know what to do

remix 039 ~ hard to switch off

inspired by “_dernhelm” :: original post
remixed image by “xjaymanx” :: googled original image

hard to switch off

hard to switch off
the child

forgot to charge my ipod
no music
for the ride in or
lunch time

thought it was okay
can deal with that
just buy a mag and
chill out

forgot to pack my house keys
my folks decided
they were coming back
after numerous assurances
this morning
they would be back
on time

the evening

wandering around london
in my long ass trousers
dragging in the rain
no music to keep
my spirits up and
a long wait before
i could jump
in the shower
and relax


remix 038 ~ a mistake

images by “jennyboozz” & theresa :: original post
remixed image by “xjaymanx

a mistake

–a mistake–

she said
and giggled
as she flowed
from one side
of the room
to the other

she growled
with glee as
david bowie glared
in bright red
on the walls

i chuckled
behind my lens
behind my smile

as her momentary
middle finger rose
and randomly broke
my distant

the snap
of the camera

remix 037 ~ i wish

images by “_intherain_” & “medvedev” :: original post
remixed image by “xjaymanx

i wish

as i
left her
in quivering tears
in the shivering rain

i didn’t look back
i couldn’t look back


afraid i would be drawn back into
her reckless aims and
careless games

as the
years fade away
i have one stabbing regret

i wish

i wish i could remember
the color of her

remix 035 ~ insecurities

images by “jennyboozz” :: original post
remixed image by “xjaymanx



during his early morning walk
he paused by the street lamp
to wrestle more intensely
with his whirling worries

as the dawn yawned with its first light
the dim swish of an opening window
swivelled his exhausted eyes
into the curious breeze

through the posts and branches
her quick rivers of windswept hair
reflected a layered gold tinged
with the ruby of her robe

and she was gone

but for a brief moment

he had forgotten all
his troubles in
the world

remix 033 ~ connections

words and images by “jennyboozz” :: original post
remixed image & words by “jennyboozz

| remix by jennyboozz


It is strange what connections remain between people.

Almost like we sense each others need for emotion, and we transport little love vessels to one another, just in time to heal the past.

Tunnel vision and lover-like waves of trusting emotions cascading down from beams of sunrays, transferring through the beauty we touch as nature. We tangle in everyday stresses forgetting we are part of nature, a creation intended for love and joy; we must not forget that.

This world denies us of our true everlasting peace. We can try and hide what little happiness and love deep inside, so the world doesn’t claw at our dreams.

remix 032 ~ that night

images by “jennyboozz” :: various original posts
remixed image by “xjaymanx

that night
| remix without text
that night | remix with “pilljar” text

that night

of all the warm summer days
and cool autumn nights
i remember that calm july evening
i remember it the most

the anniversary of our chance encounter
in the sci-fi section of the bookstore
dressed in my shirt and tie
for a cheesy business card photo

she approached from the fantasy section
a question in her intense eyes
my shocked breathing cut as short
as her cute delicate hair

“do you work here?” she asked
“i wish i did” i shakily laughed
insecure with my first impression
but helped her find her novel

this anniversary was our third
a deserted july evening
walking down our favorite hill
along the narrow moonlit river

the scent of vanilla in her hair
the smell of combustion in the air
the fireworks crackling as desperately
as the fears in my mind

she handed me the book without a word
the one i bought her those years ago
“the time traveler’s wife” it said
by someone named audrey

i stayed on the hill as she left me behind
left me unseeing unhearing unfeeling and falling
my soul shred into as many pieces
as the wet pages at my feet

i can’t forget her giggles
her figments and fashions and fragments

i can’t forget her photos
her shadows and shapes and smiles

i can’t forget that dark july evening
a thousand miles from myself

“do you work here?” she asked
i wish i could’ve said “no”

remix 029 ~ put your arm in the air

images by “iloveyoukirk” :: original post
remixed image & words by “xjaymanx

put your arm in the air

–put your arm in the air–

she persuaded him
while he laughed
in her midnight glow


he nodded
as her mood flickered
purple apathy
and pink indifference

so he lifted his hand above his head
and wiggled his silly fingers
in curious anticipation

–now close your eyes for a sec–

she urged him
as he shut them
with childlike expectation

until the icy click of the door
extinguished the

remix 028 ~ rose-colored nostalgia

images by “jennyboozz” :: original post 1 2
remixed image by “xjaymanx

rose-colored nostalgia


glancing through the record-store glass

carefully carefully
past the wind-chiming

into the temple of loosely-shelved voices

in fragmented form
through the cherished sights
and treasured

which infuse the moment with rose-colored comfort


wrapped in time-travelling wonder
before the weight-warped altars
of vinyl-pressed rhythms
and table-turned

reliving visions of an era
she vaguely remembers
yet will never

remix 027 ~ smooshed

inspired by “ladymorgaine81” :: original post
remixed words by “xjaymanx

under pressure
with no room to move

less aware than she used to be

–i don’t hear them!–

leaping three feet into the air
or skip-skipping a heartbeat

she can’t help it
she can’t find another outlet
she’s getting angry and pissed

–i don’t cry in front of other people!–

maybe she’d feel better if things started to go up
yet the higher she rises
the further she falls

maybe she’d feel different if life wasn’t so isolated
surrounded by crowds
but so entirely alone

maybe if she didn’t hate
where she was
so much

maybe if she didn’t hate
who she was
so much

maybe she’d smile

remix 026 ~ our aspirations are wrapped up in books

images by “chasingfirefly” :: original post
remixed image by “xjaymanx

our aspirations are wrapped up in books

–our aspirations are wrapped up in books–

said the pencilled message scrawled
across the makeshift bookmark
buried in her
and whispered dreamily
from her shiny slightly-curled lips


she repeated

upon the creaky finely-cracked staircase
weathered and worn with
and cardboard-boxed imagination

–wrapped up in–

type-set reflections and kindly-inked inspirations
glued and bound in
and paperbacked fantasy