Chapter 5 - Agony and Ecstasy
It was Switch's idea to stop by the mess kitchen. Maybe they'd be able to weasel some solid food out of Sugar, she said. Maybe even some hlaf, she said. Wouldn't that be nice? The precious, precious shower could wait for a few more minutes.
So she said. But she winked at Trinity as she spoke, and Trinity knew exactly what she was up to. Never would have figured Switch as a Yente…
"Yeah, sure," she replied out loud. "I'll come."
Apoc came, too. And Mouse, who was always hungry. Morpheus didn't, though, and they all had a good laugh at how fast he headed for the elevators. "I guess the Logos is home," Apoc mused, as their boots clanked along the floor. Footsteps sounded different in Zion than they did on the Neb. Less hollow, somehow.
"Home," Mouse sighed happily. "And at least until Death Day - that's ten days, minimum!"
Trinity barely heard the banter of her crewmates. She had missed Sorcha more than she wanted to let on, especially to herself. Leave it alone, her conscience was muttering insistently. Just let it go. Nobody gets hurt if you just let it go.
That's bullshit, she argued. The kid'll get hurt either way.
Less if you leave it alone.
I could just tell her, she thought, not for the first time. I could just be honest.
Tell her? Tell her something you haven't even told Ghost?
"Stop overanalyzing it," Switch's voice cut through her internal debate. Trinity's glazed eyes focused immediately, and she saw that she had lagged slightly behind the others. "Stop thinking, dammit, and feel," Switch continued, her voice pitched low enough so that no one else could hear. "You care about her - it's obvious. Why isn't that enough?"
Why, indeed? "You will fall in love, and that man, the man you love, will be the One…"
"Trinity… skies above, you don't have to marry her! You want her, she wants you. Will you please just fucking go with it?" Switch shot her a crooked grin. "Pun intended."
Trinity's lips compressed and she stared too intently at the walls of the curving tunnels. What would happen…? "We'll see," she said tightly. Switch sighed noisily and quickened her steps to rejoin the others.
As they approached the swinging kitchen doors, Trinity hung back even more. She probably doesn't even have kitchen duty tonight, she thought, suddenly wishing that she hadn't been so fast to agree to Switch's suggestion that they visit the mess. But when Mouse poked his head into the kitchen and then pulled it out a moment later with a big grin, she instead found herself wishing she'd taken a shower before coming.
"Your hair grew!" Switch's voice emanated out of the kitchen; she had crowded in just after Mouse. "That is profoundly unfair!" Trinity grinned in spite of her confusion, took a deep breath, and walked through the double doors. Why the hell am I nervous? She was older, stronger, tougher. What is it about this damn kid?
Sorcha was just pulling back from Switch's embrace when Trinity finally entered the kitchen. The other Cadets were halfheartedly scrubbing dishes, and shooting jealous glances at their classmate. She straightened up, white teeth flashing as she laughed at Switch, and Trinity's eyes flared slightly.
She was beautiful. Her face and body had filled out, the gauntness giving way to a lean but feminine physique, and her red hair no longer clung so closely to her scalp. It fell in bright waves down to the pale tips of her earlobes, and as Trinity watched, she drew a stray lock behind her right ear with water-wrinkled fingers. She was wearing a tight gray tank top that was now flecked with soap suds, and the sleeveless shirt accentuated the gentle bulges of her triceps and biceps. Trinity's gaze lingered on the tautness of the shirt as it stretched over Sorcha's breasts, until she realized where her rebellious eyes had focused.
Fortunately, the girl hadn't caught her; Sorcha was just now turning back towards the door. And when she finally caught sight of Trinity, the slow, brilliant smile that dawned across her face made Trinity's breath hitch in her throat. Not for the first time, Trinity felt herself drawn to the sheer radiance of her. To bask in that, every day. To be warmed by it- body and soul. She would give that to you, if you asked…
"Welcome home, Trinity," Sorcha said quietly. But Trinity saw the shiver of barely-contained emotion that rippled through her body as she spoke, and again was filled with wonder at her intensity.
"Hello, Sorcha," she replied, her lips curving upwards ever so slightly. "It's good to be back."
"So, can we get some food?" Mouse cut in eagerly. "There any leftovers tonight, Sorcha?" Trinity was fairly certain that the girl had to struggle to bite back a sigh.
"There sure are, Mouse," she replied brightly, turning towards him. "Look, why don't you all go sit at a table, and I'll bring you what we've got."
"What service!" Apoc exclaimed, heading for the mess hall. "Remind me to get you to wait hand and foot on us more often."
She moves more confidently, now, Trinity mused, savoring her last bite, knowing that her jaw muscles would be pleasantly sore tomorrow from having to chew for the first time in two months. Sorcha leaned down to collect Switch's plate and cup, and as she straightened up, she grinned at Trinity. Not a shy grin, or even a happy grin, really, but a mysterious little smile that brimmed with anticipation and promise. She had been flashing these looks at Trinity all through the meal, and by this time, the older woman was vastly amused. What happened to the shyness and the stammers? she wondered ironically.
Apparently Switch had caught that last little glance as well, because she suddenly leaned in close to Trinity and hissed, "If you don't take that girl to bed tonight, I will never speak to you again!"
Trinity managed to keep from falling off her chair in surprise, and instead coolly arched her left eyebrow. "Oh, really." It wasn't a question.
"Count on it." Switch dead-panned. Trinity felt as though her psyche were being split right down the middle; half of her wanted to snarl at Switch that this wasn't any of her business, and the other half wanted to laugh. Perhaps hysterically. Instead, she pushed back her chair.
"I'm heading to my quarters," she announced. "Sorcha - want to walk with me?"
Once, the girl would have gone all wide-eyed. But now, she only cocked her head to one side, smiled again, and said, "I need to clean this up," indicating their table with a sweeping motion of her muscular right arm.
"They'll do it," Trinity assured her, favoring Switch with a tight smile. Who said payback wasn't sweet?
"All right," Sorcha replied evenly, but her green eyes were twinkling. "Let me just put my apron away."
They walked along the curving halls, their heads bent slightly towards each other as Trinity answered Sorcha's questions about the Neb's most recent mission. As they boarded the elevator, their conversation was easy and casual, but Sorcha couldn't help but remember that the last time they'd been in this elevator together, she had been clutching Trinity's hot hand, her senses so acute that she'd been able to hear the pulse fluttering beneath her skin. She struggled to keep her voice level and light.
"I'm, uh, close to breaking the record on the Gauntlet," she said into the silence, cheeks coloring slightly at the brag. But she wanted Trinity to know. The older woman's eyes widened.
"Really? That’s… incredible. You've been working hard."
Sorcha nodded, a wry grin quirking her lips. "And more importantly, sleeping. Thanks to you." Trinity's ice-eyes thawed ever so slightly, and Sorcha forced herself not to look away; for all of her recently gained confidence, it was still hard. Fortunately the elevator doors clanged open a few seconds later.
They stopped at Trinity's door - the familiar door that Sorcha had run past, saluting it with a smile, each morning for the last two months. "Do you want to come in?" she asked, carefully keeping her face perfectly still, perfectly expressionless.
"Sure," Sorcha replied, but her gleaming eyes betrayed her.
The door shut behind them. Silence reigned. Trinity leaned against the cold steel of the door and crossed her arms under her breasts, facing down the girl who was leaning with similar posture against her desk.
"Sorcha -" Trinity began.
"Trinity," she interrupted, pushing off the desk and beginning to pace the room longways. "Before you say anything, can I just… can I just say…" She sighed and finally spun around to face the older woman. "I haven't spoken to you in two months. I don't know how you've changed, or what you want; I don't know what you've thought about, well, anything. I only know what I've thought." She began pacing again. "I want our friendship to continue. But I also want… I want what happened before to happen again. I want to be… to be with you. To sleep with you - not just as a friend." She turned her beacon eyes - now cloudy with emotion - on Trinity's face. "I don't have any practice with saying things like this!" she continued, the pitch of her voice rising in frustration. "But I know what I feel, dammit."
As suddenly as her outburst had begun, it was over. She took one look at Trinity's still expressionless face and sank down onto the bed, burying her face in her hands. A strange rush of affection surged through Trinity at the girl's despairing gesture, and she took two steps towards her before she even noticed that she was moving.
What are you doing? her conscience berated.
Being human! she snarled silently, and crossed the remaining space. She bent down and took Sorcha's face in her hands, gently turned it up so their eyes were forced to meet.
"There's something I need to tell you," Trinity said quietly. "Once I do, you can tell me if you still feel the same way. And if so…" she trailed off and shrugged, grinning slightly. "All right?"
Sorcha nodded, her eyes too-bright and wide, her confidence spent. Trinity sat down next to her on the bed, close, but not touching. "It has to do with my visit to the Oracle," she began, staring straight ahead, her hands gripping the ragged cotton pants just above the knees. "I've… never told anyone this. But you have the right to know." She glanced briefly at Sorcha, then away again.
"The Oracle and I didn't talk for long. I was just out of the Academy when I went to see her - a tough, smartass kid who knew everything. No one, especially some old lady whose mind wasn't even free, was going to tell me more about myself than I already knew." Trinity let her breath whistle out in a sigh. "I didn't believe her for a long time. I'm still not sure that I do. She told me… she told me that one day, I would fall in love, and that that person - that man, she said - would be the One."
"God," Sorcha breathed.
"Yeah," Trinity replied bitterly. "It's a mind-fuck and no mistake." She shook her head. "I still don't know if I believe her or not. But regardless, you need to be warned. Warned that this… that it probably won't be permanent."
Sorcha reached over to put a warm hand on top of Trinity's. Her voice, when she spoke, trembled slightly. "Chi says that in this world - the real world - you can't live maybes or might-bes. He says that if something good comes along, you have to take it. So that even if it gets destroyed in the very next minute, you've at least had it for a little while."
She took a deep, shuddering breath. "I guess what I'm saying is… is that I'll be thankful for any time I get to spend with you, no matter how short. And that I want that time to be as rich as possible."
It was as though something cracked, deep inside Trinity, at these words; some kind of shell - buried so deeply she hadn't even known it was there. It cracked ever so slightly, like a perfectly broken sand dollar, and through the narrow, hairline gap seeped every sensation or emotion that she had tried to deny since the Oracle's pronouncement in narrow, jetting streams.
It was a rush unlike even a viola. Trinity sucked in a deep breath as her body came alive, as the wave of affection for Sorcha pooled with a riptide, too-long-denied desire. She heard a low chuckle escape her throat.
"As rich as possible, eh?" she asked, smiling. "And I suppose you have some thoughts of what that might entail?" Her voice was suddenly teasing and sensual, and Sorcha leaned back in surprise, catching herself on the lumpy bedding with her hands. Trinity's eyes sparkled in amusement.
"Um," she replied, licking dry lips. "Uh. Well. Not exactly…"
"That’s all right," Trinity answered, shifting closer to her. "I have some ideas."
"You do?" Sorcha's voice grew weak as Trinity leaned towards her. She swallowed convulsively. "Have you… uh… have you done… this… with a woman before?"
Trinity let her lips lightly brush Sorcha's. "Yes," she murmured, after she'd pulled away. Sorcha shivered helplessly.
"Y…yes?"
"Yes," Trinity reaffirmed, grinning openly now. "With Switch, once. A long, long time ago."
"Oh," Sorcha murmured. With Switch? Her head was spinning, spinning… everything was spinning. She cleared her throat. "I've, uh, never…"
"It's okay," Trinity reassured her. She pressed one hand to Sorcha's sternum and pushed gently. "Just relax. All right?"
"Okay," she whispered, letting Trinity lay her back on the bed, lifting her feet so the older woman could take off her boots. Finally, they were both stretched out full length next to each other. Sorcha watched Trinity roll onto her side and prop her head up with one hand so she could look down at her. "You're beautiful," the girl said, voice saturated with wonder, lifting a shaking hand to cup the right side of Trinity's face. Trinity leaned into the touch, like a cat, and Sorcha laughed in delight.
Trinity brought her mouth to Sorcha's again, and the girl melted under her softness. Their lips moved gently against each other for what felt like a quiet eternity of tender kissing… until finally, Trinity let the tip of her tongue flick out to taste the corner of Sorcha's mouth. Sorcha gasped quietly and stiffened in Trinity's arms. Immediately, the older woman pulled back. "Too much?" she asked quickly.
"No," Sorcha replied, her breathing erratic. "Just… just so much."
A kind of awe pooled in Trinity's dilated blue eyes. "You feel things so deeply," she murmured. "It's amazing." And she closed the gap between them again.
This time, Sorcha tentatively opened her mouth, and when Trinity's tongue gently touched her own, she shivered. Trinity deepened the kiss, and soon they were both breathing erratically. Beneath her, Sorcha had begun to move, her body twisting as she tried to ease the strange, pulling aches in her breasts and groin.
"Please," Sorcha gasped finally, tearing her lips away and gulping the warm air. "Trinity, I need…" She trailed off, uncertain of what it was that she needed, knowing only that there was something more. But Trinity knew, and she smiled gently down at her, and bent her head to place light, sucking kisses on Sorcha's throat. The girl groaned softly.
Trinity let her free hand slip beneath Sorcha's shirt, and she kneaded the firm muscles of her stomach. They fluttered under her touch. Slowly, she eased her fingers higher and higher, until her knuckles were grazing the undersides of Sorcha's breasts. Trinity sighed quietly at the feeling. Soft. She lifted her lips from Sorcha's neck, suddenly wanting nothing more than to feel the girl's skin against her own.
"Lose the shirt," she murmured, grinning. Sorcha's eyes widened, and she smiled tremulously in return, then arched her back and pulled the ragged shirt over her head. "And this," said Trinity, tugging lightly at one strap of the bra - grey and shapeless - that had ridden up a little from the pressure of her massaging fingers.
Trinity sat up and shed her own garments with sure, fluid movements. She heard the breath catch in Sorcha's throat as she tossed her own bra onto the floor rug. The sight of the two small, black plugs that rested just above Trinity's breasts were not repulsive to Sorcha - hadn't she examined her own so often, those first few weeks, in the rippled bathroom mirrors? But her breasts themselves - so full, pulled downwards by gravity…
"Trinity," she whispered reverently. "So beautiful."
Trinity lowered herself back down onto the bed, slowly, deliberately pressing her naked torso to Sorcha's. The plugs were cold against her skin, and revulsion shot through her blood for one terrible instant. Wrong - it was wrong. There should be only softness, here, only warmth. But then Trinity slowly dragged her heavy breasts over Sorcha's stomach, and the girl's eyes fluttered closed as she drew in a hissing breath.
"Mmmm," Trinity murmured. "I love how soft this is." She kissed Sorcha again, slowly, lazily, flicking out her tongue to tease first her top lip, then the bottom one. Sorcha's hands grasped Trinity's waist, then tentatively moved up to stroke the long, strong muscles of her back, her fingers seeking out the smooth skin between the long line of larger plugs.
I can't believe this is happening, the thought surfaced briefly through the haze of pleasure that was quickly enveloping her brain.
Gradually, Trinity began to inch her way down Sorcha's body. Her lips crept along her jawline, then down her neck, and as they neared her breasts, she slid her hands between their bodies and gently closed her fingers around them.
"Oh," Sorcha cried softly in surprise and pleasure as Trinity kneaded them ever-so-slowly. A streak of fire flashed under her skin as Trinity's fingers rose, pinching lightly, and she cried out again, involuntarily. And then, Trinity's mouth took the place of her hands, and Sorcha's back arched at the wonderful, flicking wetness.
She whimpered wordlessly, and Trinity felt her own body respond - felt the flare of heat in her own breasts as Sorcha's hands clutched at her shoulders, her waist. I knew she'd be like this, she thought fleetingly, before tugging gently at her pants.
"Lift your hips," she murmured hoarsely. And Sorcha, her breaths coming short and sharp, looked at her with glazed eyes and obeyed.
Finally, both were naked. But when Trinity turned back to Sorcha, a bright glimmer of fear had returned to the girl's eyes. Trinity fought down the desire - so long ignored! - surging through her blood, and reached out a hand to cup Sorcha's face. "What is it?" she murmured, her husky voice betraying her burning body.
Sorcha shifted restlessly, not wanting to answer, but held in thrall by the terrible, delicious ache between her legs, by the sapphire blue of Trinity's gaze. "Trinity…" she whispered. "I… will it… hurt?"
A smile danced over Trinity's face, and she laughed, though not meanly. "No," she whispered, drawing closer again, closing the space between their bodies so gradually. "It can with men, the first time," she pressed her legs against Sorcha's, "but it won't with us." She let the baby-soft skin of her stomach slide against Sorcha's, and the girl gasped. "Relax," she murmured finally, pressing her full breasts into the girl's slightly smaller ones.
Trinity kissed her, then - first gently, but soon insistently, and the tips of their tongues met, flicking softly, wetly, one against the other. And then, her right hand began to move from where it had come to rest just above Sorcha's waist. Slowly, slowly Trinity let her fingers slide into the shallow dip below her hip bone, let them tangle gently in the soft, fine hairs below.
"Oh God," Sorcha whispered helplessly, her head lolling against the lumpy pillows. The pressure was building, just below… pressure like a storm inside her, like a spring being drawn back. Such glorious, terrifying pressure!
Trinity watched Sorcha's flushed face - her tightly closed eyes and open mouth - and again felt a rush of such affectionate compassion for this girl, lying there so helplessly, absolutely under her power. "Just try to relax," she repeated, as her fingers finally slipped into the narrow valley between Sorcha's quivering thighs. "Just let it come to you."
Her fingers moved gently against the swollen wetness, stroking and pulling and circling, slowly, slowly gaining momentum. Sorcha's breaths came in erratic pants, and she clenched her fists until her short fingernails were biting into her palms.
"Breathe," Trinity said, her eyes laughing as she leaned forward to lightly kiss Sorcha's dry lips. The girl laughed, but it became a low moan as Trinity finally slipped one finger inside her, the others still dancing teasingly against Sorcha's fevered, ultra-sensitive skin.
She groaned, then, and her back arched in ecstasy, heels moving restlessly against the synthetic cotton sheet as her hips lifted automatically to meet the movements of Trinity's insistent fingertips. Trinity could feel her body gathering, and she slowed her movements to the barest, lightest touches.
"Oh," Sorcha whimpered, feeling the glorious, unknown edge retreat, feeling the ache swell up inside, filling her, filling her so she would burst… "Oh, please…"
Trinity's mouth close around the pebble-tip of Sorcha's left breast, let her fingers speed up once more. The girl gasped at the overload of sensation and bit down sharply on her lower lip.
The pressure… oh, the terrible, delicious pressure, building just there, there where Trinity's fingers were dancing against her fevered skin… the knot, the pressure, grew tighter and tighter, tighter and tighter until her body finally understood the definition of ecstasy, ecstasy, the great pleasure-pain, so good, so good that it was sharp and unbearable…
And then Trinity let her fingers press firmly down and across that most sensitive spot, once, twice, three times - and the knot exploded. Exploded into shards of imaginary light that pierced Sorcha's closed eyes, exploded in a rush of pure sensation that carried her, flying, over the precipice.
Trinity held Sorcha's quivering body for a long time, stroking back her sweat-darkened hair, holding her tightly until slowly, she came back to herself, wide-eyed and panting. And then Sorcha smiled - a full, brilliant smile that pricked tears behind Trinity's thawed eyes.
"That was… amazing," the girl whispered, her voice ragged from gasping.
"I'm glad," Trinity replied gently, tenderly, and leaned forward to kiss the corners of Sorcha's mouth. "You should sleep," she murmured a few minutes later, when the girl's breathing had finally slowed. But Sorcha turned her heavy eyes full on Trinity's finely sculpted face, and shook her head.
"No," she said, struggling out of the wonderful lethargy to raise herself up on one elbow. "No, I -" she hesitated, her cheeks becoming even more red than they already were. She took a deep, short breath, steeling herself. "I want to, to touch you," she stammered slightly. "If you want me to."
Trinity's eyes darkened a shade - became almost black. She said nothing, but rolled onto her back and watched Sorcha with a faint smile curling her lips. The girl swallowed, reached out a shy, trembling hand to cup one of Trinity's soft, heavy breasts. Trinity sighed, her eyes fluttering closed, and Sorcha smiled in awe.
"Will you - will you tell me what to do?" she asked softly, her fingertips now circling and squeezing ever so slightly.
"You're doing just fine," Trinity murmured, and there was a catch in her voice. "Just -" Sorcha let her lips brush the pebbled nipple, and Trinity's breath hitched again. "Just do what feels good… for you."
"All right," Sorcha replied, gaining confidence in Trinity's reactions to her light caresses. She leaned down to kiss her lips… and was lost, lost in the indefinable scent of her - sweet and warm and strong - lost in the softness and smoothness of her skin, lost so deeply that the infrequent spots of cold, hard metal barely even registered in her hazy brain. And then came the heat and the wetness, and Trinity's quiet cries of pleasure as Sorcha finally found the focal point of her passion and stroked it with wondering fingers.
"So good," Trinity hissed as the fever consumed her, racking her body with shudders. "So good." And then it was Sorcha's turn to hold her tightly while her consciousness returned from that great, starry unknown. They finally lay still together, Sorcha molding herself against Trinity's back, both of them utterly spent and fulfilled in one another. Sorcha fell asleep immediately, but Trinity lay awake for a long while, thinking - thinking and realizing for the first time that she truly hoped the Oracle could be wrong.
A light knock sounded on the door just as she was finally beginning to slip into a doze. Trinity got up quietly, carefully extricating herself from Sorcha's embrace. Once she was gone, the girl rolled onto her back and flung one arm out across the bed, snoring lightly. Trinity smiled fondly and pulled on her shirt and pants, shivering at the chill they had acquired from the floor. The knock sounded again, louder.
She pulled the door open quickly… and there was Ghost, his face creased in a full, quiet smile. She felt her eyes flare wide - He can't see, he can't, it would only hurt him - but he mistook her expression for surprise.
"Welcome home," he said gravely, but his eyes - those grey, wisdom-eyes - were happy.
"Hello, Ghost," she said evenly, letting the fond smile remain on her lips. "When did you get in?"
"Just last night," he replied. "Good timing, it seems."
She smirked at him. "Or perhaps orchestrated…"
His white teeth flashed in a rare smile. "'Perhaps' is perhaps not the proper word to use." He paused for a moment. "Were you getting ready to sleep?"
He wanted to come in - she knew that. To come in, and sit on her bed, and talk to her - maybe even give her one of his perfect shoulder rubs. But if he saw Sorcha… and then the decision was made for her, as Sorcha shifted restlessly in her sleep and softly called Trinity's name.
Ghost stiffened. Trinity's eyes closed briefly, then opened again to meet his full-on, forcing herself to see the pain that flickered in those deep grey pools like lightning in summer storm clouds.
"I'm sorry," he said quietly. "I didn't know you were not alone." He turned to go, but her hand shot out to grasp his shoulder before she even knew what she was doing.
"Ghost… wait." She took a deep breath, but he forestalled her.
"Sorcha?" he asked, his voice strained and laced with agony. His eyes begged her for comprehension. "Trinity - she's so, so young!"
Trinity felt the small muscles in her cheeks contract, but when she spoke, her voice remained steady. "Does that really matter?"
He shook his head, knowing as well as she that that was not the problem. "Ghost," Trinity began again, gently cupping the side of his face. His slight stubble rubbed against her palm. "This is right, right now. Today. Like it was right for you and I, once." She let her hand fall away. "I don't know about tomorrow. No one does."
"And she understands this?" he asked. He had finally reined in his voice - it was flat and cold. Stony. Terrible.
"Yes. She accepts it."
You never put it to me that honestly, his eyes said into hers.
How I wish I had known then, to warn you, her gaze replied.
He took a step back, then, and drew himself up. "I am sorry to have disturbed you," he told her formally. And then he turned his back and walked away.
She sighed heavily and shut the door, then leaned against it, pressing her fingertips to her temples. Across the room, Sorcha slept on, peacefully.
What the hell am I doing? Trinity wondered. Am I insane? But even then, the warmth and peace of Sorcha's sleeping body beckoned, urged her to rest. To relax.
It's different this time, she tried to assure herself. Ghost didn't know - he couldn't. But Sorcha knows. She did accept it - she did. It's different.
The long, frozen voyage of the Neb - two months of white goop and a cold bed and the continual tension and anxiety - finally crashed home. Staggering under the weight of her fatigue, Trinity slowly made her way to the bed. She gently nudged Sorcha over, until she could spoon up next to the girl and bury her face in her soft hair. She stirred.
"Trinity… s'matter?"
"Nothing, Sorcha," the older woman replied, loosening her hold a little. "Nothing. Just rest."
They fell back into sleep together.
Sorcha woke up with a start, suddenly and completely awake. She lay still for a long moment, looking up at the ceiling and feeling her face heat as she remembered the night before. But the smile that curved her lips - still slightly swollen from Trinity's searing kisses - was proud.
She looked over at the wall clock - 0513 hung luminescent in the air above the low nightstand. I could go back to sleep for another forty-five minutes, she considered. But there was a kind of energy rushing through her blood this morning - a strong, vibrant force that rose up like the tide, refusing to let her lie still. She clenched her quads and calves, feeling the muscles eagerly jump into relief under her skin. I want to run, she realized, grinning broadly at the strange influx of power rippling under her skin.
No, she thought a moment later, flexing her biceps and triceps as well, feeling the cool sheet slide over the rounded muscles, I want to break the record. And suddenly she knew that if she ran the Gauntlet now, right now, she would.
Lying still in bed was simply no longer an option, but there was no need to wake Trinity. She rose carefully, dressed, and padded over to the computer, thinking to mail Chi and ask him to observe… but Trinity's eyes flickered as her computer glowed into life.
"It's still early," she murmured, raising herself onto one elbow. A lock of wavy dark hair fell into her eyes, and Sorcha crossed the room in three quick steps to curl it back behind her ear. Just that simple touch started the strange, wonderful burning again.
"I know," she said, hearing the quiver in her own voice. "But I can't sleep anymore, I can't-"
"The dream?" Trinity interrupted, quickly sitting up against the wall, her face drawn in a frown.
"No no," Sorcha laughed. "No, don't worry…" She flung her arms out and spun in a circle, totally, crazily, unselfconscious. "I feel - I feel like I'm about to overflow. With energy. I have to - to do something. Something." Her glazed eyes snapped back into focus, and she smiled into Trinity's wondering gaze. "I have to run the Gauntlet. To break the record. Now."
Trinity's dark eyebrows shot towards her hairline. "Now? Before breakfast?"
"Yes!" Sorcha exclaimed exultantly. "Now - right now. Will you come?"
Trinity shook her head in bemused bewilderment. "You're crazy," she said fondly, reaching her long arm out to snake around the back of Sorcha's neck, pressing her fingers against the cold plug as she pulled her down for a lingering kiss. "Of course I'll come. I'll observe for you."
"Will you?" she repeated, pulling back ever so slightly, her green eyes on fire. She laughed out loud then, and spun around once more. "Perfect!"
Trinity couldn't help but catch her infectious smile, and slid her legs out from beneath the covers. "Go down and get ready," she urged. I'll be on the observation deck in ten minutes."
Sorcha saluted smartly. "Right. See you soon!" And then she bolted from the room - Trinity heard her footsteps running towards the elevator. God, with even half of her energy…
The thought unfinished, she sat down briefly at her computer and typed out a quick mail to Chi.
Sorcha's gotten it into her head to try for the record. Now. Come if you can - I'll be observing.
And then she followed the girl down, down into the depths of Zion, to the great long Cave beneath the Academy where the Gauntlet waited.
The retinal scanner passed quickly over Sorcha's eyes as she stood in her narrow gate, before the webbing that blocked her passage into the Gauntlet.
"Hello, Sorcha," the electronic voice greeted her. "Do you want this session to be timed?"
"You bet your sweet ass I do!" she exclaimed, grinning wickedly, and gulping deep breaths.
"Please answer 'yes' or 'no'," the disembodied voice replied. "Do you want this session to be timed?"
"Yes, already!" Sorcha shouted, feeling her blood surge.
"Thank you," the machine replied. And then the red light above the mesh resolved into numbers. 10. 9. 8.
I will do this. I can do anything, dammit. She tensed her legs, ready to explode out of the gate and into the twisting corridors of the Maze.
5. 4. 3.
43:02. I will beat it. I will. First the Maze, then the Windmills, then the Wall…
And then the webbing flashed up, and she bolted into the dim emptiness beyond, her legs churning, her nostrils flaring as she sucked in the stale air. She felt the energy - the crazy, star-on-earth energy that coiled in her blood - seeping steadily into her legs. But it wasn't depleted, no… no, there was an infinite reservoir deep inside of her - a bottomless pool of red-gold, liquid light, filling her, sustaining her.
I will beat it. I will. She ducked her head under an overpass, tucked her pumping arms in close to her sides, and settled in for the race.
Trinity and Chi stood on the narrow observation deck that rose high on one wall of the Cave, overlooking a long, straight track - the Sprint, the last leg of the Gauntlet. A bank of computers rested against the balcony's railing; Trinity stared at the leftmost screen intensely.
"She's off," she murmured, watching as a green dot materialized on the screen, as the cameras lining the Gauntlet tracked Sorcha's position and fed their data into the monitors.
"Do you believe she'll do it?" Chi asked quietly, his hands clasped behind his back.
"I think she's capable of it," Trinity answered, meeting his eyes briefly before looking back down. "What do you think?"
"I agree," he said simply.
A few minutes later, the students began to arrive downstairs in ones and twos, breathless and exhilerated. Trinity raised her eyebrows at Chi in a silent question. He smiled.
"I told Mongoose," he said, and Trinity laughed out loud. His smile broadened at the sound.
"What's happening?" Goose shouted over the excited buzzing of the others. He elbowed his way to the front and stood beside Trinity. His curly-haired head didn't even reach her shoulders. "Where is she?"
"Just out of the maze at nine minutes," reported Pegasus, a too-thin girl of sixteen sporting the telltale, post-unplugging buzz-cut, as she craned her head to peak at the monitor. "God… what a pace!" Her voice dripped awe.
"She'll never keep that up!" Jinx cried. "She'll bonk for sure."
"The hell she will, Jinx!" Pegasus cried angrily.
"Oh, yeah?" he jeered. "Bet you-"
"Shut UP!" roared Mongoose, in a voice that sounded twice his age.
"Where is she, now?" someone whispered a few minutes later from the back.
"Out of the Windmills and on the Wall," Trinity reported coolly. "Nineteen minutes."
"C'mon," Mongoose was whispering. "C'mon, Sorcha."
The crowd on the deck only swelled as the minutes passed; soon Switch and Apoc had arrived, as well as a few members of other crews, who were up early and had heard that the long-standing record on the Gauntlet was in jeopardy. Trinity continued to update them on Sorcha's progress, but her voice grew more and more strained as the minutes ticked past.
Switch managed to worm her way to Trinity's side, at which point she whispered, "So, am I speaking to you, or not?"
"Looks like you are," Trinity replied, refusing to meet her eyes. But her mouth twitched, and Switch knew that she wasn't merely being facetious.
"About damn time!" she muttered. "The tension was driving me up a wall."
"Nearly through the Hurdles, approaching the Basin," Trinity's voice rang out. "Thirty-two minutes."
"No way," hissed Nova. "How's she ever going to hold her breath long enough to get across at that rate?" Mongoose glared at him, and he obligingly fell silent.
The crowd tensed collectively; Sorcha had to swim underwater across the long Basin without once coming up for air, and her pace up to this point had been blazing. Would she have enough wind to make it without defaulting?
One minute passed, then two. Two and a half… and she touched the other side. Cheers erupted, followed by shouts of "Get out! Get out and go!"
But Sorcha did not need their remote urging; she heaved herself out of the pool, tank top and shorts sodden and heavy, and sprinted through the sinuous passageways towards the Monkeybars, holding her hands palms-outward so they would dry before she reached the next stage.
Trinity kept her eyes on the clock in an agony of confusion. Sorcha was going to do it - she was going to break the record. What if… what if she was the One, after all? But if she is the One, I would be in love with her. And the Oracle did say "man"… But then what if the Oracle had said that purposefully, to make her more likely to let down her guard with Sorcha? Am I in love with her? I think… I think if I let myself, I could be… but does that mean that I am?
Her twisting thoughts were interrupted by a loud cry from the group as Sorcha finally came into view, swinging laboriously from the last few bars and dropping onto the floor of the track.
"Go, Sorcha! Run!" The shouts echoed off the walls, reinforcing and swelling into one wordless, urging yell. "Forty-two minutes and sixteen seconds!" Pegasus called above the noise.
Most could do no more than jog across the finish line - this last, short leg of the Gauntlet was a sprint in name only. But as Sorcha landed on the gritty floor, she turned her face to the observation deck and saw Trinity standing far above her, watching. Trinity, she thought, and even her thoughts were breathless.
Trinity saw her pause, and a sudden fear constricted her lungs. Go, Sorcha! Go!
Sorcha saw her arm fling out, pointing towards the finish line, and her eyes followed, mesmerized. The finish line. There - just there - only one hundred meters away. And in that closed, perfect, suspended moment, Sorcha finally realized the truth. Trinity, I love you… and then last reserves of perfect, golden energy flowed from her heart into her beyond-tired muscles, forcing her legs onward, not in a jog but in a flat-out run.
"Look at her go!" cried Mongoose, as Sorcha turned her head and bolted towards the finish line. She flashed past it in another few seconds, and the students erupted into applause and hollers, rushing out of the deck and down the stairs towards the ground level. Towards their champion.
"Forty-two minutes and thirty-three seconds," Chi said slowly, as if tasting the words.
"She beat it by a full twenty-nine seconds," Apoc murmured. "Jesus."
Trinity said nothing, but her lips pulled in a smile as she watched the other Cadets mob Sorcha, slapping her on the back and hugging her and throwing their arms around her shoulders. She watched as Pegasus stood shyly on the edge of the circle, watching the others but not feeling comfortable enough to add her own distinct praise. Sorcha had been like that, once - shy and uncertain. And then Trinity felt pride swell in her blood, pride that she had been such an important part in helping the girl to find her way here, here over the finish line in forty-two minutes and thirty-three seconds.
Trinity watched Sorcha turn her pale, grinning face upwards again, and punch a triumphant fist into the air. She raised one hand back, in salute, then let it fall once more to her side. I could fall in love with you, Sorcha, she realized. I could. What does that mean?
Chapter 6 >