~5A~
~2 Years Ago - 1997 - Age 35~
Down in a hole
And I don't know if I can be saved
See my heart
I decorate it like a grave
You don't understand
Who they thought I was supposed to be
Look at me now
A man who won't let himself be
Down in a hole, losin' my soul
Down in a hole, losin' control
I'd like to fly
But my wings have been so denied
-- From the song "Down in a Hole," the album "Unplugged" (1996) by Alice in Chains
"Will that be all?" the heavyset Chinese lady asked politely from behind her large glasses.
"Yeah," the tall quiet man nodded, his short hair even more unkempt than his brown suit jacket. "That's all."
"That'll be seven dollars, eighty-nine cents."
He fumbled into his ill-matching pants pockets, pulled out his cheap wallet, and handed her a crisp ten-dollar bill.
"Two dollars and eleven cents is your change."
"Thanks," he answered, picked up his large hot styrofoam cup and cool can of Diet Sprite, and found his usual spot at the far corner of the soup shop.
Today, he chose the shrimp soup. Popping off the plastic top, he scooped up a nice hot sporkful, blew at it, and gently sipped the broth, "Mmmm."
As good as always...
Tom gazed at the taxis and trucks shifting along the street, the bicyclists and pedestrians gliding along the sidewalk, dreading another afternoon at MetaCortex, or MCT, dreading it almost as much as he had dreaded another excruciating day at his first computer job, or another agonizing day at his former PrizNet Pro job. With little to hope for, little to live for, he met his 35th birthday like any other day. And it looked like it would leave him like any other day.
Early this morning, he helped Mrs. Jankowski carry out her trash. Over the last few years, she had grown even thinner and weaker. Despite arming herself with a shiny new walker, she had grown even crankier. But she was still his landlady.
"I thought you'd never wake up, sonny," she quacked. "You don't have that sleep apnea, do you? You should check that out. My nephew almost died from that."
"No, Mrs. Jankowski, I don't think so," he managed a tired smile. "I'm okay. Thanks for asking."
As best as he could, Tom stuck his spork into a nice delicious shrimp and ate it whole. As always, he sat here at the shelf table, facing out to the urban street, watching the various people glancing in and passing by, like simple images on a TV screen.
Yeah, I wish it was as simple as sleep apnea...
But there was one particular day. One special night. Exactly three years ago, he was initiated into the underworld of hacking.
As he scooped up another nice hot sporkful, Tom reflected on that night. He could still feel that wonderfully intoxicating illusion, as Katie gazed too deeply into his eyes.
"What if I told you we're hacking into MetaCortex?" the she-devil smiled seductively. "What if I told you I'm going to... let you... watch me do it?"
For the second time that night, an unexpected realization slammed into his wit. Not only were these twenty-something-old kids members of the Knights Technoir, they were going to hack into MetaCortex. But oddly enough, as if the initial shock diminished his sensitivity, Tom was getting used to it. "Why not? I've got nothing to lose."
Without turning her head, the First Knight glanced at her Left Hand of Darkness, and with her subtle nod, the ponytailed hacker leapt to his feet and blasted another two-fingered whistle across the basement. "Come on, guys and gals! It's showtime!"
As the Left Hand shut off his stereo and led the others to the humming bank of computers and monitors against the far wall, Katie stood up, brushed off her shimmering red skirt, and offered her upturned palm to the tall dark-haired newcomer. "Let's go, Mr. Neophyte."
His mouth slightly ajar, Tom eyed her hand for a moment. Then for the second time that night, he took it into his gentle grasp. "Sure."
As Levi dimmed the lights, Katie pulled Tom into the mixed audience of Priznet Pro and MetaCortex programmers who gathered around on random chairs and crates. The ponytailed Levi Stevens, alias "Left_Hand," grabbed the desk on the far left, while the platinum-blonde Melissa, alias "Shame," took the far right. The raven-haired red-horned Katie DeVille, alias "Chevalier," slid into the center seat. As Tom found a plastic crate behind Katie, the other half-dozen knights chattered in hushed anticipation of their greatest hack yet. Before he knew it, the curious screen savers were replaced with phosphorous green text upon flickering blackness.
"Whenever you're ready, Levi," Katie instructed. Over her bare shoulder, she winked at the old-timer behind her.
Tom smiled weakly and played with the sneaker crossed over his knee.
"Okay," Left_Hand began. Amidst the flowing click-click-clicks of his keyboard, horizontal lines of alphanumeric code rolled down his screen. "Establishing contact with the West City chapter. They're ready."
"Right," Chevalier acknowledged. As her flying fingers joined the clicking chorus, similar code rolled down her screen. "Engage."
Left_Hand nodded, "West City is initiating encrypted random-redirection trails. Yes. Activating dormant attack bots at six relay bases. Haha! Bots activated at PNP! Yes! And Mulpha! Waiting for your signal, Katie."
"PNP?" Tom gasped. "When did you--"
Chevalier answered softly but swiftly, "We cracked PNP months ago, before you were hired. The operation was designed to embed our bots and extract their database, but not to distribute their data." She returned her focus to her code-rolling screen, "Right! Establishing my redirection trail to Owen Patterson High. Okay. Waking my OPH bots."
"OPH? Owen Pat--" Tom still couldn't believe it.
She whispered, "Oh, that was years ago. They still don't have a clue." Again, she returned her voice to reporting level. "Okay! I'm going in. Riding under their back-door traffic flow. Mel, follow me in."
Quickly, Shame tripled the keyboard chorus. "Sure thing, boss. Riding your trail."
"West City is launching first attack wave," Left_Hand reported. "Primary bots are blocking MCT sniffers. Confirmed."
Behind Tom, the captivated onlookers offered their whispered cheers, "Yeah! Come on!"
"Okay," Chevalier followed the rolling green lines with click-click-clicking commands of her own. "Approaching the MCT firewall. Approaching the back door. Approaching. Tiptoeing. Tiptoeing. Okay. Okay. Right! I'm in the network! Mel, hold the door. Scanning for drop points."
A few more excited whispers, "Yeah! Almost there!"
"Shit," Shame uttered. "Detecting a sniffer. Must've slipped through the blocks. Redirecting our trail."
Chevalier kept her cool and her focus on the screen. "Levi, go!"
Left_Hand understood, "West City is launching second attack wave. Secondary bots at PNP and Mulpha are flooding all the front gates. Confirmed. Haha! How do you like that?"
The spectators laughed. Even Tom couldn't help but smile.
"Still scanning," Chevalier reported. "Wait! Found a weak point. Transmitting dormant bots. Okay. Shutting down 11 affected MCT machines. No, make that 13. Okay. Rebooting systems. Scrubbing logs. Good. Receiving encrypted data streams. Bots embedded successfully. Right! Drop complete! Scanning for d-base access portals."
"Go Katie!" Left_Hand cheered. The other knights joined in, "Go Katie! Go Katie!"
Shame nodded, "Back door is holding. No disruption in the traffic. No other sniffers detected."
"Scanning portals," Chevalier repeated. "A-ha! Found one. Okay. Decrypting outer portal protection."
In the center of her flickering screen, the First Knight waited as her decryption algorithm began to peel away the ten-character protection string, one character at a time. Nine, eight, seven...
"Damn!" Left_Hand blurted. "MCT defenses finally detected an intrusion. Man, they took their sweet-ass time! Too bad they don't know where it's coming from! Hahaha!"
Chevalier, Shame, and the rest of the knights laughed. Finding himself caught up in the infectious electricity, Tom chuckled.
"How are we doing, Mel?" Chevalier refocussed on her screen. Five characters, four, three. Just a few more to go.
"No change. Back door is stable and clear."
"Two more," Chevalier reported. "Last one. Right! Decrypting inner protection."
Once again, her algorithm began to peel away the protection string. Nine characters, eight, seven...
Shame blinked at her perimeter alert, "Oh, shit! Another sniffer! Redirecting our trail."
Six characters, five...
"Crap!" Left_Hand uttered. "MCT systems are shutting down key network nodes. Three of our blocker bots have been neutralized. Two of our flood bots have been severed. Crap! You better hurry, Katie!"
Four, three...
"He's right," Shame agreed nervously. "Confirmed. Detecting two more unblocked sniffers! I don't know how long I can keep this door open!"
An endless moment of breathless intensity filled the basement.
Two characters...
"Hurry up! Hurry up!" Chevalier hissed at her decryption algorithm. "Two more. Okay. Last one. Come on. Come on..."
In anticipation, Tom leaned forward and murmured, "Come on, Katie. You can do it."
"Come on," she repeated, too occupied to hear his support. "Okay. Okay. Gotcha! Decryption completed. D-base penetrated! Extracting data!" Like a cracked dam, the MetaCortex database spilled lines upon lines of endless glowing-green code down her computer screen. Company hierarchies. Departmental POs. Employee records. Financial transactions. Insurance benefits. W-2's. 401k's. Everything.
Like fireworks, the knights behind Tom exploded into a triumphant arm-raising roar! "Yeah!"
"Shut the fuck up!" the First Knight roared back. "We're not done yet!" She returned to keyboard-clicking attention to the exposed flood of information. "Okay, Mel. Passing the data streams to you. Now!"
"Confirmed," Shame smiled. "Encrypting data streams. Rerouting data packets around the sniffers."
"Good," Chevalier acknowledged. "Initiating pullout. Recrypting inner protection."
Left_Hand reported, "A total of five blocker bots neutralized. Three flood bots severed. They're gonna shut down our Mulpha attack relay!"
"That's okay," Chevalier reassured him. "It's almost over."
Shame laughed excitedly, "You can say that again, boss! Duplicating data packets. Rerouting duplicates to West City."
"Sounds good to me," Chevalier smiled back. "Okay. Recrypting outer protection. Okay. Okay. Backtracking out the back door. Backtracking. Slowly. Slowly. Right! I'm out! Floating out their back-door traffic flow."
"Oh well!" Left_Hand groaned, "They finally shut down our Mulpha relay! The remaining relays are holding."
But Shame reported awesome news, "Transmitting our packets to the eastern BBSs. Yes! West City now transmitting their packets to the western BBSs. Yes! Breaking away from your trail in a few moments."
Sitting up straight, Chevalier nodded impatiently, "Excellent! Okay. Severing my OPH link to MCT."
"Breakaway complete!" Shame keyed her last few command strings and sighed deeply, "Logging off. I'm done. Done as an overcooked turkey."
The knights laughed. So did Tom.
Chevalier continued her furious finger-flying on the edge of her seat, "Link severed successfully. Good. Deactivating my OPH attack bots. Deactivating. Bots deactivated successfully. Right! Hibernation complete! Okay. Severing my link to OPH. Okay. Okay. Link severed. Okay. Terminating redirection trail. Terminating. Good. Come on. Good. That's it! Logging off! That's it for me!" She exhaled and collapsed backward into her chair. "How are we doing, Levi?"
Everyone in the dimmed room turned to the skinny ponytailed PNP programmer with the Cheshire-cat grin. But at the moment, his grin was nowhere to be found. Amidst the subtle hum of the machines and his rippling click-click-click of the keys, the horizontal lines of phosphorous code cast a sickly viridescent glow upon the captive audience. Holding his breath, Tom looked to Katie then back to Levi.
Left_Hand nodded, "West City is deactivating all remaining attack bots. Yes. Hibernation complete. West City is severing all remaining links to the five remaining relays. Yes. Yes. Three remaining. Two. One. Yes. Links severed. West City is terminating trails. Terminating. Yes. Yes. Holy shit!"
"What?" Chevalier cried at him. The rest of the knights froze all around them.
"I can't believe it," he murmured.
Chevalier shot out of her chair. "What? What are you talking about?"
With a toothy smile that stretched from ear to ear, Left_Hand whispered, "We did it." He laughed. Then at the top of his lungs, he screamed, "We did it! Boys and girls, we fucking did it!"
Without any hesitation, the knights leapt to their feet, thrust their arms, and pumped their fists in another victorious explosion! "Yeah! Woo-hoo! We did it!"
Tom couldn't believe it either. Oddly enough, as the infamous Knights Technoir cheered in seeming slow motion all around him, he found himself cheering along with them. And as the devil-horned First Knight winked over her shoulder at him, he found himself floating into her slender-eyed smile.
Katie, you did it!
~5B~
Spearing another plump orange-tinged shrimp with his spork, Tom watched as a young Asian couple passed by, lost in their conversation, oblivious to his presence behind the glass. For an instant, he could see the girl's face, her cheeks, her eyes. Eyes that painfully reminded him of the slender eyes he first saw years ago.
Oh God. Did it really happen?
Back then, even in his wildest dreams, Tom never imagined anything like this could happen.
Oh God. Is this really happening?
He gasped, his hands grasping her tiny waist.
"Ahhh... Ahhh..." The demon moaned, rising and falling upon him.
He gasped, his excitement sliding in and out of her.
"Ahhh... Ahhh..." She moaned, rising and falling upon him once more.
He gasped, his eyes glancing at her perfect form, then away at the dim ceiling.
"Ahhh... Ahhh..."
He closed his dark eyes, too unsure to gaze into hers, too afraid to see hers gaze back into his.
"Ahhh... Ahhh..." As if reading his mind, she closed her eyes, and tilted her head back in absolute and infinite surrender. "Oh God..."
In seeming slow motion, her horns tumbled down her long velvet hair onto the covers.
"Ahhh... My God, Tom... Oh Tom..."
His eyes snapped open. Oh God.
Rising and falling, her slender eyes smoldered with soaring pleasure. Tossing him another seductive smile, she tightened her hidden muscles and observed his reaction.
"Uhhh," he shuddered.
Oh God.
"Do you believe in fate?"
Lost in the shock and awe and disbelief of the moment, he finally turned from the blank ceiling to the ageless face gazing curiously at him. "What?"
Katie rolled to her side and propped herself up on her elbow. "Do you believe in fate?"
"I... I don't know," he stumbled. "I've never thought about it before."
"Let me put it this way..." She traced a delicate finger over his bare chest. "Have you ever asked yourself, 'Why me?' "
He had to admit he did, and chuckled softly, "Yeah."
She smiled knowingly, "Then you believe in fate."
He returned to the blank ceiling above him. "Really?"
"Yup," she giggled briefly before growing more serious again. "Personally, I don't."
"Why not?" Staring at the ceiling, he began to stroke her forearm.
"Well..." Katie scanned around her, behind her, below her, and beneath the crinkled covers. Finally, she found them, snatched them, and squeezed the bright-red foam. "You see these horns?"
He focussed on her devilish headband and nodded.
"As I look at this two-dollar piece of plastic..." She turned it over in her hand. "I'd hate to think that 'fate' chose to buy it for me, that I didn't choose to buy it myself."
Tom began to wonder. Or tried to. It was one of those things too philosophical to think about.
She rested the plastic headband on his chest. "I'd hate to think that 'fate' can tell me what to do or what to think. You know?"
"Yeah. I think so." For now, he agreed just to agree.
"Forget it. I'm not making any sense."
"No, it's not you," he shook his head apologetically. "I... I'm still new to all this. Me, a hacker? It'll take me some time to get used to."
She giggled, "It didn't take you much time to get used to my... ummm..." She laughed out loud.
"Well," he began, then joined her adorable laughter.
For a few frozen moments, Katie studied his expression thoughtfully. His eyes. His nose. His lips. Definitely, his lips. Staring at his lips, she suddenly kissed him, and whispered into his ear, "Happy birthday, my neophyte."
"How'd you know it was my--"
"I'm Chevalier Premier of the Knights Technoir. Don't you remember, Thomas A. Anderson?"
As if the timeless light of the smiling sun rained down and warmed his uncertain soul, he smiled widely.
"My name is Tom."
With about half of his delicious shrimp and noodles left in his styrofoam cup, Tom still felt as empty and lost as ever. Three years ago, not only did Katie DeVille take him into her knightly underworld, she took him into her willing arms and passionate heart. She let him explore, not only the unlimited depths of electronic information, but the hidden heights of physical pleasure. A wondrous night. A magical night. Or so he thought back then.
Now he wasn't so sure.
Why me? Is it fate?
But one thing was certain. That night changed his life.
Over the next several days and nights, Tom learned all he could from Levi and Katie, sometimes Melissa and the other knights. He absorbed all he could about hacking and its history, its technologies and techniques, its terminologies and tendencies, its tricks and temptations. He studied the fascinating and illuminating posts across dozens of electronic bulletin board systems, or BBSs, including those put up by Levi. Posts about redirection trails, attack relays, dormant bots, and security sniffers. Posts about traffic flow, network firewalls, database portals, and decryption algorithms. Everything he needed to know. Everything. Even posts by followers worshipping the Knights Technoir, their chapters, their members, and their conquests. Conquests including Mulpha, PrizNet Pro, and most recently, MetaCortex.
But he learned something else. Something quite curious.
Morpheus. His name conjured the most-sophisticated conquests in hacking history. Government complexes. Military installations. Financial institutions. Even intelligence headquarters. His name was legendary. Even mythical. Some believed he was just that, a myth. Others believed he was a fictional character played by several real hackers. Then there were those who believed he was the greatest hacker who ever lived. After all, there was still an ongoing debate on whether he was still alive on the run, or perhaps dead while copycats carried his name. Curious. Mysterious. But that wasn't all. For many of his followers, two other mysterious names seemed to be closely linked to Morpheus.
The first link was Trinity. Some believed he was a disciple of Morpheus. Others believed he and Morpheus were one and the same person. But while a few crackpots dissented, the overwhelming majority in the BBS community seemed to agree that more than ten years ago, either Trinity or Morpheus as Trinity was responsible for the penetration of the IRS database. And responsible for the monumental deletion of over 250,000 taxpayer records. A quarter of a million government records! Back then, a feat of such an enormous magnitude was inconceivable. Even now, just cracking the IRS network, let alone the database, would require a typical team of no less than three or four hackers. Amazing. Definitely amazing.
But shortly following that feat, Trinity disappeared. Without a trace. As if he vanished into thin air. A mystery.
The second link was even more mysterious. It was called Matrix. Or, The Matrix. Even before Trinity emerged, a long-time hacker noticed a strange seemingly-misplaced line inserted into one of his older posts: "The Matrix is all around us." Soon, others noticed similar lines in other BBSs. In the middle of one post discussing hacking strategies, a line read: "The Matrix is everywhere." At the bottom of another post welcoming new BBS members, a line read: "The Matrix has you." Eventually, news of the unidentified Matrix phenomena spread throughout the BBS community like wildfire. As best as the community could figure, someone was randomly hacking their own boards, dozens of them, scattering and planting these tiny seeds like needles in electronic haystacks. Terrifying. Yet somehow comforting.
Only one name came to mind. The only one who could've done this. Morpheus.
Then the unthinkable happened.
The week following her MetaCortex triumph, Katie vanished. As mysteriously as Trinity had vanished.
Why?
The Knights Technoir were shattered. The East City chapter was shattered. Levi and Melissa were devastated.
Why did you do it?
Without their First Knight, their Chevalier Premier, their heart and soul, the knights were lost.
Why did you leave us?
But most of all, Tom. Tom had been abandoned.
Why did you leave me?
As the weeks and months passed, the East City knights grew less interested, less intrigued, less involved. They faded away, one by one. Fearing for their own lives, and paying their respect for hers.
Where did you go?
To make matters worse, both PrizNet Pro and MetaCortex were downsizing in a brutal software market.
I need to know.
Yet Tom persisted and pursued in the electronic underworld. After all these years, he finally found something to pursue. While the others grew up, dropped out, moved away, and moved on.
I need to know the truth.
Within six months, not only did Melissa quit her lead position at MetaCortex, she officially quit the East City chapter, leaving Levi and Tom as its last remaining members. Meanwhile, Levi and Tom began to split in their own way. While Levi followed the path of a true hacker devoted to the old-school principles of free information and free technology, Tom was willing to pursue and explore and stray from that limited path. To risk the path of a cracker, a criminal hacker. As Trinity had done before him. As Morpheus had done before them.
Does it have to do with Morpheus?
Within twelve months, Tom was let go from PrizNet Pro. Then in a stunning response to his old colleague's dismissal, Levi tearfully dissolved the East City chapter of the Knights Technoir. As their final acts as knights, they posted their official dissolution throughout the BBS community and took down their BBSs. The East City knights had officially faded away. But by this time, while Levi stood on the sidelines, Tom single-handedly maintained the embedded bots at Owen Patterson High, Mulpha, PrizNet Pro, MetaCortex, as well as a half dozen other relay bases. Not to mention another half dozen of his own.
Does it have to do with the Matrix?
Within eighteen months, Tom was caught. Caught off guard. That is, pleasantly surprised by MetaCortex and their offer to hire him as their newest programmer in a slowly rebounding software market. But despite that surprise, he never wavered in his underground exploration or his electronic pursuit. Always asking. Mastering. Hacking. Cracking. Selling his advanced hacking utilities that he designed and developed for himself. Selling his unique hacking services to steal secret technologies and techniques from corporate competitors. Selling. Stealing. Breaking any and every computer law as he saw fit.
That's the question, isn't it?
Whatever it took, wherever it took him, Tom needed to know. It didn't feel like a high-level government conspiracy. Or a top-secret military project. It felt bigger. Deeper. More profound. More pervasive. He needed to know the truth. He needed to know what the Matrix was. Every mystery pointed to it. Morpheus' whereabouts. Trinity's disappearance. Katie's disappearance. As well as the mystery surrounding the Matrix itself.
What is the Matrix?
Two years passed. Then a third. And Tom was still no closer to uncovering the truth. No closer. No clearer. But he had no choice. To find the answer, he needed to find Morpheus. And to find Morpheus, he needed to scour the unscourable depths of the electronic underground. He needed to. He had to. For himself. And for Katie. He could barely remember her eyes. Her lips. Her voice.
"Happy birthday, my neophyte."
But he was no longer a neophyte. He was a master hacker. And his alias was Neo.
Yeah. Happy birthday, Neo.
As he sat at the shelf table, facing out to the urban street, he drank the remaining bits of his lukewarm soup.
End of ~5~