Inside
Trinity wandered the quiet, abandoned streets and enjoyed the silence that stretched around her. She knew, as she had reminded herself for years whenever she entered the Matrix, that it wasn’t real. Still, it was quite a sight, now that everyone who hadn’t been lost in the great war had been unplugged into the real world.
In front of a traffic light the cars stood neatly in a row, unmoving, even though the light flashed green, like toys left over from a child’s forgotten game. The aroma of baking food still wafted from the restaurants, even though no guests would ever be served again. From an open window, a curtain slowly trailed in the soft summer breeze as it chased away a small pile of dust beside a discarded old broom. The tiny particles danced golden in the sunlight.
It was eerie, and it wasn’t real. But it was also a relief. Every single place in the real world was crammed with disoriented, confused people; Zion and every ship were almost bursting with inhabitants. Yes, Trinity thought with a wry smile, this mission inside the Matrix was definitely her favorite, ever. And the thought that it was going to be the last, and everything after it would be the pains and joys of the real world, made it even sweeter in its flavor of goodbye.
She sat down on the edge of the sidewalk, stretching her legs in front of her and taking in the feel of this strange world. After sharing the cramped quarters of the Neb with others, even if it was Morpheus and Link, the silence and solitude were a pleasure. Of course, she thought, solitude was only nice as long as you knew you wouldn’t be alone forever.
As if on cue, she felt a gust of cold wind rushing around her, and in front of her, Neo suddenly materialized as if out of nowhere. She got up and brushed off the dust that had settled on her shiny vinyl suit with his arrival. “Done playing Superman?“ she chided with mock annoyance.
He grinned, and she knew that behind his glasses his eyes were twinkling playfully. “Almost.“
“Everything clean?“ she asked. It wouldn’t do to shut down the program and leave people behind. There were so woefully few left, anyway...even though in the confined space of the real world it sure didn’t seem like it right now.
“They’re all out. The code is so monotonous, it’s almost frightening. I could sense you from miles away.“ He tilted his head, and she was almost sure that he winked at her from behind the dark shades. “But then, maybe that’s because it’s you.“
Trinity stifled a grin and rolled her eyes. She knew that, like everything in here, Neo would see what she had done. “So the mission is accomplished, then?“
“Just one more thing,“ he said secretively, and she raised an eyebrow.
“What’s that?“
He took her gloved hand and pulled her close, and she could feel her feet slowly leaving the ground and lifting into the air. “Something I’ve always wanted to do.“
“Neo,“ she scolded, even though she felt a rush of excitement at flying without any assistance, looking down to see that they were already several hundred feet above the lonely street. The one other time she had flown with Neo hadn’t really been enjoyable, what with a bullet in her chest, but *this*…she loved every second. "We have to get to the exit,“ she said regretfully. Orders were orders, and they weren’t exactly here to have fun.
"Later.“ The low purr of his voice close to her ear made her shiver, and any thought about orders suddenly seemed meaningless. "Any place you’ve always wanted to see?“
"None of them are real,“ she shrugged, trying to stifle her excitement. They *weren’t* real. But it was the chance of one more live, multicolored, touchy-feely joyride, and in their brave new *real* world, she knew, those would be few and far between for the next couple of years. And it was the closest to Neo she had been for two weeks, and her heart was pounding, even as her mind told her both of them were only projections of the digital self.
"Oh what the hell,“ Trinity muttered, and he smiled, waiting for instructions as they hovered in the blue sky. She thought about it for a moment, then she knew what place she wanted to see, once again. "Kansas.“ He wrinkled his nose. "What?“ she asked defensively.
"I had kinda expected something more...exotic,“ he answered.
"I grew up there. Well, technically, I didn’t, but...you know.“ He nodded, and she felt them starting to move through the cool air. She glanced down at the world speeding by, wrapping her arms tightly around his shoulders. Everything seemed so small, so much like the dollhouse she knew it actually was. Tiny and fragile, ready to play with. Ridiculous, she mused, that in the Matrix, everyone had always felt so self-righteous, so powerful. How could they have been fooled, when they looked down on it and saw their small lives from afar?
She sighed and felt Neo wind his arms around her a little more closely. "Looks as unreal as it is, from here,“ he said contemplatively, and she marveled for a second at how his thoughts sometimes echoed hers. "Still, it’s pretty, isn’t it?“
It was. Below, patches of green and brown flew by, occasionally sprinkled with the colorful dots of cities and houses. Blue lakes glittered in the sun, and on the tops of the mountains were white caps of snow. If there had been a God, she figured this was what it would have looked like to Him, and taking his perspective was definitely a heady feeling. The rush of breaking the rules, of nature, of the program, of their own fears shot through her, her blood prickling hotly just under her skin. She began to understand why, in spite of the danger, Neo loved this, why he had subjected himself to fights with agents and the rules of the Matrix even when he didn’t have to any more.
In the distance she could start to make out the yellow fields of their destination, and as Neo lowered them slowly she saw the white houses, blooming gardens, and little crystalline rivers surrounded by high, green grass. For a moment she felt a sting of pain as she remembered how she had left this place – disappearing into the night, into a new life, abandoning everything she had ever known. Then she felt Neo squeeze her to him, as if he felt her turmoil, and her melancholy subsided. Everything since she had left this place had led her on the road to him. It was only fitting that the journey through this world ended here, and now, with him.
“Right place?” he asked, and she nodded as he set her down on the lawn of a neat house, already starting to grow wild without careful maintenance.
“It hasn’t changed at all,” she whispered, looking around. The swing was still there in the branch of the cherry tree, the flowerbeds were unchanged, and the scent of the roses hung in the air as it always had.
She felt Neo come up behind her as she stared. “It can’t. Change is only in the real world.” She nodded slowly. Yes. Change was life, and this wasn’t it. It was a still picture, as if she had jumped into one of her childhood memories – which she had, really. “Want to go somewhere else?” Neo asked quietly, but she shook her head.
“Once more, with feeling,” Trinity said, and cracked a wry smile at him. Yes, she’d look at it once more, knowing that it wasn’t real life…but that it had had its sunshine, and happiness, and beauty. She took his hand, drawing him to the edge of the garden and into the field where the crops had grown golden brown. Summer, she thought. This was what summer felt like.
She suddenly realized that she was terribly warm in the vinyl, about at the same time that Neo tugged slightly at her hand, and she noticed that he wasn’t wearing the long black coat any more, but jeans and a white shirt. “You’re terribly overdressed, Trin,” he said, eyes sparkling. He reached out a hand and trailed it down from her chin, between her breasts, to her navel, and with a slight tingle she felt the tight suit change into a loose, short garment.
She gasped, looking at the little pink flowers that adorned the white dress, and noticing that it barely reached her thighs. “Neo!”
He grinned brilliantly, and she couldn’t let his smug expression pass without swatting him across the chest. “I’ve always wondered if that’d work.”
Trinity snorted and turned her back to him, walking deeper into the field. He was impossible sometimes. It would’ve been a lot easier to be exasperated, though, if he wasn’t so damned cute. “Why did it have to be pink?” she complained.
He caught up with her easily and took her hand again. “Because this is not the real world.”
She looked up at him, tugging a lock of hair back behind her ear. Her hair obviously was in disarray, too, she noticed absently. His gaze was full of love and mirth, and she thought that even though none of this might be real, the look in his eyes was, and that was all that mattered. “What else are you up to?” she asked as they strode on, up to the small lake she knew was hidden behind the trees that stood at the edge of the golden-brown abundance.
“You mean the pink dress wasn’t enough?” Damn him for that smug grin plastered across his face, she thought, but only half-heartedly.
She raised an eyebrow. “Oh, more than enough. But I can hardly believe there’s not more up your sleeve.”
“One or two things.”
Pushing a thick, green branch aside with her arm, she pulled him through the woods into the small clearing with the lake. “Like what?”
She stopped short. It was beautiful, more beautiful than she had remembered. She felt Neo close to her back as she stood there, drinking in the view of the lake, the sun setting in all hues of yellow, orange and red over the hills in the distance. His body barely touched hers, but suddenly she was very aware of his presence, at this place where she had spent her childhood and a good part of her youth…where she had first been kissed. A life that had been so different from what she was to become… “Just…things like the dress. That aren’t possible in the real world…right now.” She could hear the smile in his low voice, and gasped as she realized exactly why he had brought her here.
“Neo!” Turning around and looking into heated brown eyes only confirmed her assumptions. “You are aware that *anyone* on the ship could be watching?”
He couldn’t be serious. Still, she felt her resistance falter when he wrapped his arms around her waist. “They were all preparing for bed when we left. Hardly anyone will be up.”
She shook her head, pretending her resolution was stronger than it truly was. “‘Hardly anyone’ could be Morpheus or Link…you *do* remember, the captain, and our operator?”
“Yeah, I do seem to recall. Those two people who share our room.” He smiled into her scowling face. “It has been too long, Trinity.” Yes, she thought, right now when he was so close, the loss of privacy over the last couple of weeks was painfully obvious. “Besides, there were a few things I still wanted to try. You know, for the sake of science…being the One and all.”
To her dismay, she felt a heady rush of excitement at the ideas suddenly swimming through her head. Making love in a world where anything was possible… A glance at Neo told her that he could see right through her to the core of her pounding heart, and the heat uncurling inside her belly. Damn you, Neo, for making me feel like a schoolgirl…for being so irresistible… she thought fleetingly, even though she knew that no one had ever made her do anything, be anything she didn’t want, not even Neo. These feelings were all her own. But who was to blame her? His lips were dangerously close to hers…and she hadn’t even kissed him in days. Just give in to one kiss…
As if he could sense the exact moment where her resistance faltered, he suddenly pressed his lips to hers in a soft kiss, stroking and sucking gently at her lower lip, asking for permission. She sighed against his mouth, and he took advantage of it, plunging his tongue into hers. God, yes, it had been too long. He broke off, all too soon, it seemed to her, and looked at her with passion-filled eyes. “Tell me no, Trinity. Tell me no right now, and we’ll go back.”
She didn’t want to. She didn’t want to say no, in spite of all the implications. She fingered the buttons of his shirt, trailing her fingers down into the ‘v’ at the neck that showed off a bit of his chest.”This isn’t the real thing,” she whispered.
“Then look at it as a beautiful dream,” he answered, his breath stroking her cheek as he pressed a kiss to her hair. “A goodbye to this place.”
It was never the feverish, wildly passionate touches that undid her with Neo. It always was the gentleness, the care he indulged her in, the softness which only he had ever taken the effort to touch her with. And this lightest of kisses to her temple, along with his low words, did her in now. She didn’t even have the words to answer. She just nodded her head.
On board his ship, Morpheus looked up from the evaluations of the latest graphs that he had started while giving the monotonous code of the Matrix a glance now and then. Monitoring was hardly necessary anymore, now that all but Neo and Trinity were out, and those two could handle themselves.
But for some reason, the thin lines which kept tabs of the pair’s vital stats were behaving strangely. A quick glance at them proved, as expected, that the two bodies were still and silent. No obvious injuries, apparently. Morpheus furrowed his brow as he glanced at Trinity’s erratic heartbeat on the monitor, then looked at the Matrix code more closely.
Where were they, anyway? The last time he had looked, they had been in the city… He stared at the green on black figures for several long minutes, until a slow smile crept up his face. Not exactly what they had been sent in to do, but then, he’d never been very intent on following the rules of Commander Lock, either. He pushed back his chair, gathered his papers and left the room, locking the door behind him. Apparently, they wouldn’t need an operator in the next couple of hours. Tomorrow morning would be early enough to get them out.
Trinity had been on countless missions inside the Matrix, and every single one of them had somehow stuck in her memory - all adrenaline-induced highs, all dangers, all triumphs, all losses. But now as she stood at the shore of the small lake, smelled the summer breeze, heard the humming of the bees, and was kissed by the man she loved, she realized that the memories of her time before being unplugged were buried, and hazy.
It didn’t seem to her like she had ever lived, really, inside this world - ever really breathed, ever really loved…no, she knew for a fact now that she had never really loved. Maybe this was why everything seemed so enhanced now, so filled with meanings and interpretations she had never seen. Or maybe, she thought as she pulled back a little to look at him, it did because Neo was shaping it for her.
Anyway, she knew that it was somehow connected to him, this change of her world, and she loved him all the more for giving her a good parting memory from this artificial place that she had always only associated with pain. “Are you alright?” he asked, tilting up her chin to look into her eyes.
Maybe I’m not…I’m beginning to like the Matrix, she thought. “Yes. Why?”
“You’re grinning.”
She pulled away, but only far enough so she could still hold his hand, and lifted an eyebrow. “So?”
He, in turn, grinned back at her, and she thought that if anyone saw them now, their reputations as war heroes would be irreversibly ruined. But the war was over, and they needed a break, she decided defiantly. This was a dream, like Neo had said…and tomorrow, they’d wake up and face rebuilding the world. But not tonight. Not tonight. “You don’t grin,” he said, and she could hear that he was very pleased with himself.
“Goes to show I’m insane to have agreed to this,” she snapped back, even as she let him pull her back against his chest.
In spite of the settling dusk, she could see his dark eyes sparkle, and as always, his eyes, those honest chocolate eyes which mirrored his soul, unsettled her more than any caress could have. “You look good when you grin,” he whispered against her lips.
“Shut up, Neo.” This time it was her who closed the distance between them, snaked out her tongue to stroke his lips, tangle with his. She felt his arms come around her waist eagerly, his hands rubbing circles on her lower back. From where he touched her, heat spread through her body in radiating waves, and the hacker inside her, the soldier who had tracked him for months and since then watched him progress to the point where he was stronger than any of them, wondered how the *hell* he did this. The woman inside here didn’t care. And for once, the woman won.
Dimly, Trinity noticed that he was lowering her to her back, and she deepened the kiss hungrily while she wrapped her arms around his neck. He tasted just a touch different than she was used to, and she was relieved to notice this digression from the real world, to see that the Matrix wasn’t perfect.
It came close, though. Very close, she thought, as his hands left her back and trailed up her sides.
He pulled back a little and sat back on his heels between her parted legs, frowning in that way which heralded one of Neo’s experiments with the code. She knew that expression by now, but still, it didn’t fail to make her stomach flutter in anticipation.
His fingers tugged at the straps of the dress, and suddenly, the fabric dissolved into nothing, leaving only pale skin behind.
*Only* pale skin. Trinity rolled her eyes. “This must be a dream come true for you,” she said drily.
A look at his face told her that, indeed, it was. But then, she had to give him credit. He always looked at her like she was the best damn thing he had ever seen when they were making love. ...And that was the only reason why she let him get away with this. “I didn’t like the whole saving the world angle that much, but this…this I like a lot.”
He beamed down at her, and she let out a chuckle.
“At least I’ve gotten rid of the pink flowers,” she said, sitting up and reaching for the buttons of his shirt. “I’m going for the old-fashioned unbuttoning, though.”
She made quick work of the shirt, let her hands linger on his chest for a moment, feeling the taut muscle under his warm skin, then trailed her slim fingers down to his navel, and lower, into the waistband of the jeans.
His breath caught in his throat, and he watched her with dark eyes that prickled on her skin while she unbuttoned the pants, too, and slid them down his thighs. No underwear, either, she noticed with appreciation, but gave him a look anyway, just for good measure.
“Hey, fair’s fair,” he smiled, and she snorted, lying back and pulling him with her.
“Kiss me, Neo.” And so he did, softly at first, then more thoroughly as her breathing grew heavier. The kisses gradually rose in heat, in passion as he settled his hands on her sides again, outlining the contours of her body, then slid them up to cup her breasts. The touch was like fire, or ice, leaving burning trails on her skin. She felt like every fibre of her body hummed when he touched it ever so fleetingly, as if the molecules of her body answered to him.
Then his lips left hers to follow the path his hands had taken, and she thought she’d go insane, feelings uncurling inside her that she had never thought possible.
His tongue trailed moist lines down her chest, hitting in all the right spots, at the hollow of her throat, between her breasts, the place below her breast where the bullet had struck her that one fateful night when he had brought her back, and that had been so sensitive to his touch ever since. As if her body remembered where it had mingled with his.
She threw back her head as soft puffs of air left her mouth, now that she, for once, wanted to let words speak instead of actions, unable to convey them. That she loved him, that she loved this, that she only ever wanted him to touch her like this…
“Neo,” she gasped, and he lifted his head from her stomach, and met her eyes.
“I know,” he simply whispered. “I know. Just enjoy, Trin.”
Her head lolled back as his hand touched the inside of her thigh, and even if she had wanted to, uttering any more words would have been impossible.
Slow, almost lazy fingers feathered touches over her heated skin while his mouth descended to her navel again, his tongue dipping into the hollow, then lower, and lower, until his tongue met his fingers in her one most sensitive spot.
Trinity threw back her head and let out a shameless moan that she’d never have allowed herself within hearing distance of any living soul, and which made her lover chuckle against her skin. Dimly, she vowed to herself that she’d kick his ass for that. Later. Much later, when he wasn’t doing spectacular things to her body, things that made her feel like she was turning into liquid fire, all heat centered in the one spot he was attacking right now.
Much, much, much later, she thought, when she felt his fingers slide into her and all reason left her mind.
It was right. It was *just* right, and if she hadn’t exactly known that he could read her like a book, see her body mapped out in front of him, she wouldn’t have believed the pleasure even as it was coursing through her. It wasn’t possible. It wasn’t. But then, it wasn’t possible, either, to love someone that much, and be loved in return, to pull someone back from the edge of death, to have something that was so beautiful, and right, the only constant, the only truth in a world of lies and illusions. Neo…
“Neo,” she rasped, “Please.”
It was the closest she had ever come to begging, and he gave her a smile that told her he understood, and didn’t make her wait.
She forced her eyes to hold his gaze when he entered her, wanting to draw out the moment even while her body quivered for more, for the rest.
“Anything. Anything, Trinity,” he whispered, before he leaned down to mimic the motion of their bodies with their lips.
Soon, too soon, it was all too much. The sight, the sounds, the scents, the heat inside her body that was melting any wall she had ever built up around her feelings, her behaviour, the emotions which had boiled for a long time and now finally bubbled out.
Everything twisted together into a dazzling blur of colors and lights dancing behind her eyelids, and in a moment of total bliss, total perfection, that seemed as if she’d worked towards it her entire life, she truly reached completion, a strangled sob wringing itself from deep inside her.
Through the blood drumming in her ears, she heard him cry out in response, then felt him collapse on top of her, and wrapped her arms and legs around him, not wanting to let go, ever.
Slowly, the pulsating heat subsided into a comfortable, warm tingle, and she sighed contentedly, thinking that if this qualified as a dream, it was the best she had had her whole life.
Still, it had been too good to be a dream. Dreams, nice as they were, never hit her *just* right, like this had. Every. Damn. Time.
She pressed her cheek to Neo’s shoulder, her fingers stroking the damp hair at the back of his neck. He raised his head just a few inches to look down at her expression, and, apparently satisfied with what he saw, slumped back down.
“You liked?” It wasn’t a question, and she considered smacking his cute butt, but then decided to let it pass this once, and just go with the truth.
“I loved,” she whispered, close to his ear, then tugged at his hair so he looked at her. “Can’t beat the real thing, though.”
His smile was warm, and spread from his eyes down across his features. “Yeah.”
She gazed into his eyes, silently letting everything she felt seep into her look and flow into him, then planted a soft kiss on his lips. “Let’s get some sleep, and then go home.”
He rolled to the side, taking her with him so she was cradled in his arms. Above them, the stars were starting to glitter, sparkling as if they knew it was the last time, and they wanted to make the best of it.
In the soft grass, the couple nestled closely to each other, and slept.
“Operator?”
“We need an exit.” Trinity was back on the lonely sidewalk, dressed in her vinyl suit, only now Neo stood next to her, rubbing idle circles into her palm with his thumb.
“Trinity.” Morpheus’ voice sounded conspicuously cheerful. “How nice of you to call. Sleep well?”
At her side, Neo smirked, and she punched him into the ribs, just because. “Fine, thank you,” she simply answered. “Now, the exit?”
She could have sworn she heard Morpheus chuckle at the other end of the line, but thankfully he gave her the directions, and the two of them walked down the road, hearing the lonesome ringing of the telephone from afar.
Trinity cast a look around. The cars were still standing in front of the traffic lights, the curtains were still trailing in the breeze. Slowly, the dust was settling, though, leaving the impression of an abandoned setting in a closed theatre.
Over everything, a sense of closure hung peacefully, conciliatorily.
“My team has returned. The mission is completed. Shutdown approved,” Morpheus said into the communicator, and after a few seconds the corresponding signal lights from the other teams all flashed green.
“Ready?” he addressed Neo and Trinity, who stood next to him, watching as the last step of their war was coming to its end.
“Ready?” Trinity asked, grasping Neo’s hand and squeezing gently.
He smiled, and she could see that the burden he had carried for too long was finally lifted from his shoulders. “Yes. Are you ready?”
For a few moments, Trinity kept staring at the green figures, letting the images of times past flash before her eyes. Then she nodded. “Nothing left there we can’t have here,” she answered, giving Neo a true smile, for the first time in years feeling utterly carefree and peaceful.
Morpheus punched in his code, and the Matrix crackled one last time before the screen went blank.
Wordlessly, all three remained still for a moment.
Then, they switched off the monitors, and headed off to their morning tasks.
END